I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize