I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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