You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
