When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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