Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
