my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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