Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Of course I have a pirate flag
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
