I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Too much gin, very little bucket
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
