Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
