I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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