Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
