Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
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