I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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