was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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