with your own penis?
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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