I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
