Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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