I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize