We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
