I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Randomize
