who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
