So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
