i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
