hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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