My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Randomize
