after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
