she smelled like a LAN party
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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