Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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