Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
