So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
