I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
