Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
