ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
