I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
