Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I have fence marks all over my body
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
you never un-have a 4some
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
