you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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