yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
