What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
