He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
She said her name was "party"
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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