something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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