Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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