i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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