But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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