I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
