Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
