Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
