I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
