I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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