it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
