Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Randomize
